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  Topic: Chuck Norris Jokes
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corona



Joined: 13 Jun 2009
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Post  Post subject: Chuck Norris Jokes Reply with quote

i love these jokes and felt like starting a topic for it Smile
all you have to do is insert a Chuck Norris Joke...simple
i'll start us off

Chuck Norris visited The Virgin Islands...now they are only called The Islands
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Sat Apr 10, 2010 12:58 am
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XVongolaX



Joined: 05 Aug 2009
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NOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!! WHY MUST YOU START SUCH A THREAD!!!?!?!?!?!?
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Sat Apr 10, 2010 1:24 am
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Skye
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"Chuck Norris once bet NASA he could survive re-entry without a spacesuit. On July 19th, 1999, a naked Chuck Norris re-entered the earth's atmosphere, streaking over 14 states and reaching a temperature of 3000 degrees. An embarrassed NASA publicly claimed it was a meteor, and still owes him a beer."
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Sat Apr 10, 2010 1:33 am
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corona



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they once made a Chuck Norris toilet paper...but it wouldnt take shit from anybody
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Sat Apr 10, 2010 1:57 am
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ZeNavras



Joined: 04 Feb 2009
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Chuck Norris does not wear a condom. Because there is no such thing as protection from Chuck Norris.


second one

Chuck Norris is the reason why Waldo is hiding.


third and fourth

Chuck Norris can set ants on fire with a magnifying glass. At night.
The "Lord of the Rings" directors wanted Chuck Norris to play Frodo. But Chuck denied them because he thought it would only take a pansy 3 movies to destroy a piece of jewelry.
Sat Apr 10, 2010 2:34 am
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Aussie4Life



Joined: 03 Apr 2010
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1.Chuck Norris once had sex in a back of a truck, Today that truck is known as "Optimus Prime".

2.There are no Weapons of mass destruction in Iraq, Chuck Norris lives in *Oklahoma*(hope its spelt properly)
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Sat Apr 10, 2010 3:35 am
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XVongolaX



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I didn't get Navras' 4th one and Aussie's 2nd one.
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Sat Apr 10, 2010 4:45 am
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Skye
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XVongolaX wrote:
I didn't get Navras' 4th one and Aussie's 2nd one.

Navras' fourth one references the plot line of the Lord of the Rings movies. Namely that the "One Ring" had to be destroyed by being cast away into the fires of the volcano that forged it. But because Chuck Norris is Chuck Norris, he would simply have broken it himself.

As for Aussie's second one, it's simply implying that Chuck Norris is the only weapon of mass destruction in the world, and he's not in Iraq. He's in Oklahoma.
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Sat Apr 10, 2010 5:23 am
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Glenfiddich



Joined: 22 Jun 2008
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Chuck Norris can touch MC hammer.

Chuck Norris ordered a Big Mac at Burger King, and he got one.

If at first you dont succeed, youre not Chuck Norris.

When Chuck Norris does a pushup, he is not pushing himself up, he is pushing the earth down.
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Sat Apr 10, 2010 6:20 am
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Communist



Joined: 01 Dec 2009
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Chuck Norris' shadow was beaten to death by Chuck Norris for being too close.
Sat Apr 10, 2010 7:10 am
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XVongolaX



Joined: 05 Aug 2009
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Skye wrote:
XVongolaX wrote:
I didn't get Navras' 4th one and Aussie's 2nd one.

Navras' fourth one references the plot line of the Lord of the Rings movies. Namely that the "One Ring" had to be destroyed by being cast away into the fires of the volcano that forged it. But because Chuck Norris is Chuck Norris, he would simply have broken it himself.

As for Aussie's second one, it's simply implying that Chuck Norris is the only weapon of mass destruction in the world, and he's not in Iraq. He's in Oklahoma.

Then I don't find Navras' fourth one really funny :<
I liked Aussie's though.
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Sat Apr 10, 2010 7:38 pm
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Aussie4Life



Joined: 03 Apr 2010
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XVongolaX wrote:

Then I don't find Navras' fourth one really funny :<
I liked Aussie's though.

I prefer the Optimus Prime one to be honest.
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Sun Apr 11, 2010 9:59 am
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ryan101496



Joined: 18 Feb 2010
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1.if u have five dollars and chuck Norris has five dollars chuck Norris has more money than u

2.if u ever look chuck Norris in the eyes and he gets mad u will implode instantly
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Sun Apr 11, 2010 10:29 am
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Communist



Joined: 01 Dec 2009
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Chuck Norris' tears can cure AIDS and cancer. Too bad he never cries.
Sun Apr 11, 2010 10:47 am
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marine



Joined: 22 Jun 2009
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chuck norris is so tough he dont have a chin under his beard, there's only another fist.
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